The Screaming Seams

The title of this post sounds like a band name.

I wish it was. I wish it was and not the new name I gave to my gi.

It seriously felt like the seams of my gi were holding on for dear life after my Thanksgiving stuff-myself-until-I-hate-myself. I can’t put all the blame on Thanksgiving. We went on a little weekend getaway with some friends. So Thursday was followed up by a Friday eat-like-all-the-food-in-the-world-is-going-to-disappear. Then came a Saturday let’s-see-how-many-meals-I-can-fit-in-one-day. I finished it all with a Sunday I-wonder-if-I-can-make-my-pants-bust-at-the-seams.


Four days in a whirlwind of turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, pecan pie, pumpkin pie, pumpkin cheesecake, biscuits and gravy, BBQ chicken pizza, tacos, quite possibly the best cheese pizza I’ve ever had in my life, beer, macaroons, margaritas, double cheeseburgers, bacon cheese fries, Cheddar’s…



I mean delicious AF, but gross. And, I’m a little ashamed at the sheer volume of food I put down in a four day period.

Like I said, gross.

The first classes back, both kickboxing and BJJ, after my food massacre were brutal. It also teetered along the edge of comical. I couldn’t help but to giggle a little at my lack of mobility and energy while totally singing this in my head…


I felt like a stuffed turkey in my gi. My kimono couldn’t quite close all the way. I noticed a much shorter length of belt to tie with. My pants were snug enough that they kept sliding off against the slickness of my compression shorts I wear underneath. Like a sausage casing that couldn’t hold it all in.


My savior in the embarrassment factor was that I had to get back to work so I couldn’t stay too long. Fingers crossed that with the hard work I’ve been putting in so far this week, everything will fit a little better by Thursday’s classes.


As you get older you are so much more aware of how your body works and the ways in which it will revolt against you if you don’t treat it right. It’s amazing, and also not amazing, how food affects your body. I say both because sometimes it surprises me how much more in tune with my body I am than I was in my youth. I mean it’s common sense that if you are going to fuel your body for peak performance or to lose weight you can’t eat junk.


I notice such a big difference in cardio, movement, and energy when I eat the healthy foods and when I eat the shit foods. In my youth I never cared about health and eating well and I guess due to that youthful, endless energy and sports I just didn’t notice how foods could affect my body. Today, I notice a drastic difference when I fuel my body with what it needs.

It’s the difference of “I feel amazing and I want to do all the things,” when I eat healthy and “I feel like shit. I’m going to lay on the couch and watch Netflix,” when I eat crap.

I was already completely disgusted with myself anyway, but last night filled me with even more determination to make sure the screaming seams never make another appearance.


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